saltandlight

Our children are passing these “growing up” milestones left and right.  More and more I am reminded of how they are growing up and needing me less and less.  And needing God more and more!

Our son moved back into the college dorms last week, this time as an RA.  This week our daughter started college classes with dual enrollment AND got her driver’s license and started driving, BY HERSELF!  This year is already starting to be a lot for me!  It’s hard on a Mama’s heart to start realizing they are growing up.  Personally the hardest part of parenting has been the letting go.

It feels a little unfair. We are made to love them fiercely, it’s just our nature.  We make all of their decisions for them when they are little. And we get used to that.  We get used to being the one that they turn to for help. And then suddenly (it feels like overnight), they are trying to do things on their own.  Who do they think they are?!

I’ve learned a few things the past few years though, you might say that I have been “growing up” as well.  First of all, they were never “mine” to begin with.  Last year when my son first moved into the college dorms, I was crying and praying and asking God why this has to be this way. And I felt like He spoke to me and said, “He is my child. You dedicated him to me as a baby.  He has to go through this now so that I can use him later.”  God gives us the awesome privilege of being a parent. Raising these tiny beings to love God and serve Him.  But, with that privilege comes the heartache of letting go.

Secondly, we can’t raise them to depend on us.  We need to raise them to depend on God.  We are not always going to be there, God is.  We can’t fight their battles for them.  God can.  We will let them down at times. God won’t.  We don’t always make the best decision for their good, because don’t know it all.  God does. We are not God. We are just the vessel He uses on this earth to raise these children.  And He does a much better job of taking care of them than we can!

Third, we can’t depend on our children.  All of our hope and faith is in God, not our children. God must be first in our hearts, our children cannot be placed ahead of Him in our lives.  It’s a hard pill to swallow, when we realize that is what we’ve been doing.  God had to show me that a few years ago.  I started a new job that required me to be away from home for a few days at the time and I had to miss some important school events for both of my children. I was so upset about that, it bothered me for a really long time. I knew that God had put me in the position and that it was His will that I do it.  But, I didn’t understand why I had to miss these important moments.  But, He showed me that I was putting them ahead of Him. That is one of those things that I think us Mama’s feel like we can get away with.  But, God will not let sin go unpunished, no matter how we justify it to ourselves.

Lastly, we must realize that being a Parent is not the only job God has for us.  Don’t get me wrong, for a season that is going to take up most of your time. Especially if you work outside of the home.  But, as they get older and need you less, you will find that God has more work for you to do.  You aren’t just so and so’s Mom (or Dad).  You have other gifts that God wants you to use for His kingdom.  Talk to Him about it and find out what they are.  It’s a bittersweet time.  You are letting go a little more as Mama and you are embracing what God has in store for you next!

These are just a few things that God has taught me the past couple of years.  The learning process is painful, but the fellowship with Him is sweeter and sweeter.  And since I love to write, I feel led to share this with all of you. 🙂

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.  Romans 8:28

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. 3 John 1:4

Christmas has come and gone. I’ve always heard the phrase “slow as Christmas”, but when you think about it Christmas is not really slow.  It sneaks up on us pretty quickly every year and before you know it, it’s all over with.  All of the family gatherings, the food, the lights, the presents, it’s all over with just as quickly as it came.  What about the spirit of Christmas?

By Christmas spirit, I mean kindness. The focus on the birth of our Savior.  Happiness, forgiveness, showing grace to others, helping others.  These are the things that we see people doing more at Christmastime than the rest of the year. Christmas just brings that out in people.

What if we take that kind of spirit with us into 2020? The miracle of the birth of Christ and His life on earth did not happen just for us to show kindness to each other for one month out of the year.  He came that we “might have life, and that we might have it more abundantly.” (John 10:0)  “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”

2019 might have felt like a “rough” year for you.  I understand that.  But, can I tell you this? God does some of His best work in our hearts during our “roughest” times.  That is how we grow closer to Him. I know it’s hard to see that during the midst of our troubles. And sometimes we can’t see the good that comes from things until years later. We may never know the good that comes from our trials. But, we have a promise from God in Romans 8:28. “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.”

Take your trials and your heartaches right now, and give them to God. He knows and understands what you are going through.  Lay your head in His lap and let Him comfort you.  Feel His embrace around you.  Know that you are loved.  Know that everything that you go through is for a purpose and for YOUR good.  Let 2019 go knowing that God was there with you and will go with you into 2020.

Take His spirit with you. If you are not sure if you have His spirit with you, all you have to do is ask Him. Ask Him to come into your heart, forgive you of yours sins and walk with you. And then continue to talk with Him everyday.  It really is that simple.  The more you talk with Him and read His word, the more of His spirit you will have within you. To lead and guide you into 2020.

Not only is this a new year, but it’s a new decade.  2020 is your year to get closer to God. 2020 can be the year that God makes a change in your life. 2020 is the year that God is going to move in mighty ways. Don’t you want to be involved in that? I’ve seen Him move alot in 2019 but I feel that even more is to come in 2020!  I’m so excited to see what God is going to do this year.  Don’t miss out on the blessings God has for you because of selfish stubborn pride.

“Father I come to you today praising you for all that you have done this year. Lord it may be some difficult situations that you have brought us through. There are things that you kept us from without us even knowing about it. You are so good to us, Lord. Even the times that we feel are not so good, I know You are at work and You will work it all out for our good. Thank you for taking care of us. Thank you for blessing us with the faith of others. Lord I pray that You will guide us into this new decade. Give us more of Your strength and Your love that we might use it to show others who You are. Lord, I know that You are working behind the scenes to prepare Your children for the upcoming battles that we will face. I know that you have been working in the hearts of many to do Your work. I pray that this is the year that we put feet to our prayers and we get to work in the field.  I know that the fields are ripe for the harvest. People are starving for You. They just don’t know that You are what they need. They have been deceived by the enemy. I pray that You will show us how we can reach these people. Put us in place to serve you more and to serve you better in this coming year. Thank you God for all that You have done, all that You are doing and all that You will do. I just ask humbly that You use me however you see fit. In Your Holy and Righteous name! Amen!

I heard someone make the comment the other day that they are just ready for Christmas to be over with!  All of the hustle and bustle and stress that comes along with the materialism of Christmas undoubtedly has gotten the best of some of us. And I completely understand because I have felt the same way in years past.

But, what a sad statement to make!  Think about what we are celebrating.  That’s like saying to someone that you love that you are so ready to get their birthday over with! Christmas is not about us.  Not at all! It’s not even about our children.  I don’t have to tell you why we celebrate Christmas, it’s the birth of our Savior. We celebrate Him and Him alone.

For some, Christmas has become all about the gifts and getting together with family.  For some it is all about giving of ourselves. For some, it is a lonely time of year.  I love all of the things about Christmas that everyone else does.  The lights, the Christmas songs, the food, getting together with family, giving gifts.  There is nothing wrong with these things, unless we are placing those things ahead of Jesus.  It must be all about Him or we have completely missed the point!

We can very easily get so caught up in the busyness of the holiday that we burn ourselves out to the point that we are ready to get it over with. When we get to that point, it is easy to adapt a rude or hateful spirit.  We get there without even realizing it.

I want to encourage you today to take time during the next few days to get alone with God. Once you have spent some time in His presence, you will find your spirit is much more at peace. Besides, the BEST present we can give to Jesus for Christmas is ourselves. That’s all He wants from us.  It’s amazing that He only wants to spend time with us, but we are the ones that benefit from time spent with Him!

Spend some time reflecting on the scriptures in Luke Chapter 2.  Remember how simple that first Christmas was. And remember that the gospel story doesn’t stop at the baby in the manger. He didn’t come just for us to worship a baby in a manger, He came to save the world from our sins!

We all go through tough times, some tougher than others.  We have heartaches and heart breaks.  That is just life.  We go from skinned knees and sprained ankles to car accidents and health problems. We go from having an empty piggy bank to a negative balance in our checking account with more bills due!  Or if not financial problems, there are broken relationships and broken homes or health problems and diseases.  There are always problems to deal with. The worst ones for a parent are when your children go through problems that you can’t fix. When they start getting older and start finding out the hard way that people cannot be trusted. It’s hard to watch and not get in there and handle it yourself.  

Everywhere we turn there are problems. We have our own problems and situations that cause us stress and then we have so many of our friends and family dealing with problems and situations.  It can really stress you out!  It may be because I’m getting older, but I’ve never seen a time that so many people are having problems and issues.  Death, disease, financial strain, health problems, family problems, relationship problems work stress. More than likely you are currently going through one or more of these right now.

So, why does God allow us to go through these things?!  Well, I’m glad you asked!  Because here is the good news. Romans 8:28 (one of my favorites!) And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.  What does this mean? It means that all things (everything that we go through, good and bad) work together for good (the end result will be good) to them that love God (His children). What you are going through right now might not seem too good.  But, I promise because God’s word promises, that He is working it out for your good!  (That is if you love God, if not then we need to have another type of discussion!)

We also have to remember is that God knows all.  We as humans like to think that we have all the answers and we know.  God gave me this analogy years ago that I like to use.  Think about ants.  They are busy, busy hard working building their ant hill.  And you love ants so much (I know you don’t really but just bear with me)!  You see that there is a lawnmower heading their direction and it is going to kill them and their anthill.  So, you dig up their ant hill. You’ve destroyed their home, but they will live and rebuild.  They still don’t understand that you just saved them from the lawnmower heading their way.  Isn’t that how we are with God?  He sees all and knows all.  He sees the disaster heading in our direction.  And sometimes what seems like a bad thing to us, is actually God digging up our ant hill to save us from ourselves.

Sometimes we have to look for the blessings in situations that seem bad to us.  We may not be able to see it now, but we can look back at past situations and see where God was working it all out.

And sometimes we just have to trust God.  No matter what, we know that He has promised that He is working it all out for our good.  In the meantime we can pray and ask God to give us peace in the midst of our storms while we are trusting Him to work it out!

Use that time to draw closer to Him. Read His word and talk to Him. You may actually realize that this storm is what you needed to draw closer to Him.

Lastly, we don’t like to think about this but it may be that we have brought this on ourselves.  Ask God to show you why this is happening and what can you do to fix the situation?  It’s a hard pill to swallow and I’ve had to swallow my share of hard pills!  But, God is merciful and gracious and He only punishes us in order to help us to do better and to be better! (If you have children, you totally understand this!)

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10 

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12

Today is Black Friday. I don’t know how we got to this point, but in America we have actually made an extra holiday out of shopping and fighting over sales and those hard to get deals for Christmas. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good sale and a good deal. Who doesn’t?  I’ve been “black Friday shopping” before, and I’m not condemning anyone who does it.  I am just wondering what America has turned Christmas into that we (some of us) are willing to fight the crowds to get the “perfect Christmas gift” or the best deal.

Even after Black Friday, the whole month of December will be filled with gatherings and shopping and gift exchanging.  It’s a busy time of year.  All in the name of Christmas! We stress over what to buy our kids and spouses for Christmas. We stress over fitting in all of our family gatherings and making everyone happy! We stress over having the money to buy everything that we want to buy. We stress over all of the dates on our calendar. By the time Christmas gets here, it’s a wonder we haven’t had a nervous breakdown!  We’ve stressed all month until we can’t really enjoy the day and what it is really all about.

I wonder what Jesus thinks about all of this?  I wonder if He looks down at us doing all of this running around and just shakes His head.  I can just imagine Him saying “Really? You had to fight that person to get that toy to give to your child that already has too many toys? And you are doing this for Christmas?”

We have forgotten what Christmas is all about.  We don’t need to go broke trying to get our children the biggest and best gifts.  God sent all of us the best, most special Gift we will ever receive over 2,000 years ago! The absolute best thing you can do for anyone for Christmas (especially your children) is to make sure they know about this special Gift!  How God sent his son to be born in the lowliest, most humble place.  He was a gift to all of us!  He came into this world just so that He could take our place on the old rugged cross.

Please don’t spend this whole month preparing for Christmas and totally miss the point. Don’t get so wrapped up in the presents that we miss out on His presence!  This Christmas season let’s take the time each and every day to spend some time with Jesus. After all it is His birthday! All He wants for His birthday is you.

She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins. Matthew 1:21

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God. John 3:16-18

“You can’t have your cake and eat it too!”  This is true for so many situations isn’t it?

Think about this scenario for a moment.  You are in a committed relationship (dating for a while or married), you realize your significant other is distant from you.  Not as close as you once were.  And then you find out that this person has been cheating on you.  They are putting someone else in their life ahead of you.  They are doting on this person, talking to them, dressing nice for them, spending alot of time with them.  You have been put on the back burner, tossed to the side.  You are just an afterthought and only when this person decides they can spare a few moments of their time for you. How would you feel?  Hurt?  Angry?  Both?  It is not okay to treat someone that way.  If you are in a committed relationship you should be spending your time with that person.

So, how you do you think God feels when He is treated this way?

Was there a time in your life that you were on fire for God?  You read His word and you spent time in prayer with Him?  But, lately it seems like you just haven’t had time for those things?  Can you not afford a set amount of time each day to spend with Him?  Let me tell you something, you can’t afford not to!

Revelations 3:16 “So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.”

We can’t play church, pretend to love and serve God and then turn around and act like the rest of the world.  We as Christians are supposed to be set apart.  We are supposed to be different.  If we are living for the world and then singing “Oh how I love Jesus” on Sundays, something is wrong!

Isaiah 29:13 ” And the Lord said: “Because this people draw near with their mouth and honor me with their lips, while their hearts are far from me, and their fear of me is a commandment taught by men,”

Check your heart.  Pray and ask God to reveal to you where you are failing Him and where there is sin in your life.  We must die to ourselves every day and ask God to fill us with His spirit.

Galations 2:20  “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ”

Don’t let the world dictate your steps.  Let God reign in your life.  He wants all of you, not just the scraps and crumbs.  Once you surrender it all to Him, you will have more freedom and more blessings than you could ever have living for the world!

Do you ever feel that you just don’t get anything out of the worship service at church?  Maybe you don’t care for the music or the people.  Maybe you didn’t really understand the message or the pastor wasn’t excited enough.  I understand that.  I’ve been there.

When I started listening to contemporary christian music, I felt so free in worship.  I thought “Oh wow, that song is so worshipful” and it would make me want to lift my hands and worship God.  And I thought “Man, why can’t all churches sing these kinds of songs? They are so worshipful.  Some of those old hymns don’t feel very worshipful.”

Something that God has shown me as I’ve grown closer to Him is that when I come to church, I bring my worship with me.  I’ve realized that if my heart is in the right place, and I have been praying and studying the Word, I am already worshiping God before I get to church.  No matter what songs are being sung. No matter the style of the preaching. I can feel the spirit moving when I bring my worship into God’s house with me.

Now, no one is perfect and some days I am just not feeling it. That is when we need to pray, and ask God to empty us of ourselves and fill us with His spirit.  We need to lift our hands up in spite of our feelings. Our feelings can’t be trusted.  Jeremiah 17:9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?  That is not to say that we should fake it.  Rather, we should be praying and offering our worship to Him from a place within us that knows He is worthy!

We know that God is worthy of our praise, no matter how we feel!  We know that He is our maker, our Lord, our Savior, our Guide.  He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords!  He is the Master of the Universe!  And He desires worship from you!  He desires a relationship with you!  Why wouldn’t we submit to Him in worship, no matter how we feel?

Worship is not just the act of lifting our hands during a song that we like.  Worship isn’t just praying or just preaching.  Worship is not just going and sitting on a church pew.  Worship is none of these things and it is all of these things.  It is not just the “act of doing” but it is getting our heart right and offering all that we are to Him. You can do any of these things, but if it is not done from a clean heart, it is not acceptable.  John 4:24  God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.

We can worship God any time, any place.  We can carry our worship around with us. God knows our hearts, He knows us better than we know ourselves.  The more time we spend with Him, the more worshipful our spirit will be.  The more time we spend with Him, the more equipped we will be to handle anything this world has to throw at us. He is just that good to us.  He gives us way more than we deserve, why not give ourselves back to Him?

Romans 12:1-2 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Have you ever heard or maybe even said “kill them with kindness”?  I know I have heard it and said it many times over the years. Basically when the world is being mean to you, be nice to them anyways, right?

When my children were younger, I would tell them this alot of times when dealing with bullies at school.  And even as an adult, I see this message spread around on social media a lot.  And sometimes I feel the need to be the same way. Even if I don’t really care for this person’s attitude or personality, I’ll try to be nice to them when I’m around them. Nothing wrong with that, is there?

Think about these words.  How is killing someone kind? Your going to be kind, but deep down you want them dead? I know that isn’t what most people are really thinking when they say that, but it’s kind of what it means.  You really don’t like this person, but you are going to be nice to them anyways.  This can lead to sin in other ways as well.

If you are nice to them but you really don’t like them, and you know other people don’t like them, then you are going to be tempted to gossip about them when they aren’t around.  Or you may have evil or unkind thoughts toward that person, which is also sinful.  (For nothing is secret, that shall not be made manifest; neither any thing hid, that shall not be known and come abroad. Luke 8:17)  (Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth! And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell. James 3:5,6)

So, in praying about this recently I felt the Lord speak to me. He said, “maybe instead of killing them with kindness, you should love them like Jesus”.  And this has resonated with me for a couple of weeks now.  We should love people just simply because we are commanded to.  We should love their hearts and their souls.  We don’t have to love their actions and we can speak truth to those people in love if they are living sinfully.  We should pray for them.  And I guarantee you that when you start to pray for them, you will start to love them.  You will care about their souls even if they keep disappointing you in the flesh.  (Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die. Ezekiel 18:4)

It boils down to what is in our hearts.  If our heart is full of sinfulness, we are going to have a very hard time loving anyone else. If our heart is full of ugliness, it is going to spill out onto others in some way. And if we claim to be a christian, but our words or actions aren’t a reflection of Christ, we can hurt our testimony.

In order to overcome this sinfulness, we must die to ourselves daily and agree to live for Him. (I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20)  Everyday pray and ask God to show you your heart and ask God to remove any filthiness and forgive you of your sins. And in order to grow in our walk with God, we must read God’s word daily, and we must pray to him continually!  (Pray without ceasing. 1 Thessalanions 5:17)

We absolutely cannot do this on our own. Believe me when I say that I had my toes stepped on with this truth as well! I believe this is a struggle for most people!  That is why we need a perfect, sinless Savior. If we could do it on our own, we wouldn’t need Jesus!  (I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.  The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.  I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd giveth his life for the sheep. John 10:10)

If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:18-21

But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; Matthew 5:44

My Sunday School lesson Sunday was a good one! They are all good but this one I felt was more for me than it was for the kids!  The lesson was about the sower and the seed.  The parable that Jesus taught comparing to the types of soil to our hearts.

“Listen! Behold, a sower went out to sow. And as he sowed, some seed fell along the path, and the birds came and devoured it. Other seed fell on rocky ground, where it did not have much soil, and immediately it sprang up, since it had no depth of soil. And when the sun rose, it was scorched, and since it had no root, it withered away. Other seed fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up and choked it, and it yielded no grain. And other seeds fell into good soil and produced grain, growing up and increasing and yielding thirtyfold and sixtyfold and a hundredfold.” And he said, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear.“

Some seed fell along the path or by the wayside and the birds devoured it before it could even take root.  These are the ones (people) that when they hear the word, Satan immediately comes and takes it.  They are dry, empty and don’t really want to hear the truth.

Some seed fell on rocky ground, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up but because it had no depth of soil, it couldn’t grow.  These are the ones that hear the word, receive the word but they have no root in themselves. When trials come or persecution arises, they back away. They don’t have any depth.

Some seed fell amongst the thorns and the weeds. It may have taken root and tried to grow, but the thorns and weeds choked it out.  These are the ones that hear the word, but are immediately distracted by the things of the world.  The things of the world choke out the word we just received.  But, only if we let it!

And finally other seeds fell into good soil, rich soil. It produced grain and increased. These are the ones that are rooted and grounded in the Word.  They receive the word, they accept it and they apply it to their lives. They “bear fruit” by telling others and living a Godly life.

The one that stood out the most to me is the second one.  The rocky ground.  I believe these are the ones in our day and time that go to church regularly.  Pay their tithes like they should.  Maybe even sing in the choir or lead in some other way.  But, they are so busy doing all of these things, along with working and raising a family, that they forget to take personal time with God.  The don’t read their Bible daily and if they do, it’s a quick little devotion that they read and go on about their business.  They don’t spend very much time in prayer. They say a quick prayer and instead of meditating and waiting to receive a word from God, they go on about their business.

The reason this spoke to me so much is because I’ve been there myself!  I know how easy it is to get caught up in the busyness of life and forsake alone time with God.  And I am afraid that as a society that has become the norm.  It is acceptable, even encouraged to stay busy.  Go, go, go! Run here and there, take this child to this practice, make it to this child’s recital.  And in the mean time, be sure we get a good picture to post on social media so everyone knows what a happy family we are!  We even have to schedule family time!  I understand, believe me I really do!

That is why I encourage you today to take some time to yourself, alone with God.  Just talk to Him.  Tell Him what’s on your heart.  Read some scripture and meditate on it.  Listen to some praise music and give Him your worship.  Believe me when I tell you that it is so worth the sacrifice of your time.  You will receive such a blessing from that time with Him.  And then when you go to church and hear the message, you will get more from the message when your heart is prepared.

You can’t grow a garden without preparing the soil.  And your heart needs to be prepared to receive God’s word!