saltandlight

Our children are passing these “growing up” milestones left and right.  More and more I am reminded of how they are growing up and needing me less and less.  And needing God more and more!

Our son moved back into the college dorms last week, this time as an RA.  This week our daughter started college classes with dual enrollment AND got her driver’s license and started driving, BY HERSELF!  This year is already starting to be a lot for me!  It’s hard on a Mama’s heart to start realizing they are growing up.  Personally the hardest part of parenting has been the letting go.

It feels a little unfair. We are made to love them fiercely, it’s just our nature.  We make all of their decisions for them when they are little. And we get used to that.  We get used to being the one that they turn to for help. And then suddenly (it feels like overnight), they are trying to do things on their own.  Who do they think they are?!

I’ve learned a few things the past few years though, you might say that I have been “growing up” as well.  First of all, they were never “mine” to begin with.  Last year when my son first moved into the college dorms, I was crying and praying and asking God why this has to be this way. And I felt like He spoke to me and said, “He is my child. You dedicated him to me as a baby.  He has to go through this now so that I can use him later.”  God gives us the awesome privilege of being a parent. Raising these tiny beings to love God and serve Him.  But, with that privilege comes the heartache of letting go.

Secondly, we can’t raise them to depend on us.  We need to raise them to depend on God.  We are not always going to be there, God is.  We can’t fight their battles for them.  God can.  We will let them down at times. God won’t.  We don’t always make the best decision for their good, because don’t know it all.  God does. We are not God. We are just the vessel He uses on this earth to raise these children.  And He does a much better job of taking care of them than we can!

Third, we can’t depend on our children.  All of our hope and faith is in God, not our children. God must be first in our hearts, our children cannot be placed ahead of Him in our lives.  It’s a hard pill to swallow, when we realize that is what we’ve been doing.  God had to show me that a few years ago.  I started a new job that required me to be away from home for a few days at the time and I had to miss some important school events for both of my children. I was so upset about that, it bothered me for a really long time. I knew that God had put me in the position and that it was His will that I do it.  But, I didn’t understand why I had to miss these important moments.  But, He showed me that I was putting them ahead of Him. That is one of those things that I think us Mama’s feel like we can get away with.  But, God will not let sin go unpunished, no matter how we justify it to ourselves.

Lastly, we must realize that being a Parent is not the only job God has for us.  Don’t get me wrong, for a season that is going to take up most of your time. Especially if you work outside of the home.  But, as they get older and need you less, you will find that God has more work for you to do.  You aren’t just so and so’s Mom (or Dad).  You have other gifts that God wants you to use for His kingdom.  Talk to Him about it and find out what they are.  It’s a bittersweet time.  You are letting go a little more as Mama and you are embracing what God has in store for you next!

These are just a few things that God has taught me the past couple of years.  The learning process is painful, but the fellowship with Him is sweeter and sweeter.  And since I love to write, I feel led to share this with all of you. 🙂

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.  Romans 8:28

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. 3 John 1:4